Free Kindle Break Through (Library Edition): When To Give In, How To Push Back ebooks Download
“Well, he does have a good side.” “You know, it’s probably my fault.” “She’s had a rough life. I need to cut her some slack.” When you really care about someone, it’s easy to get stuck in painful, even destructive patterns—caving in to a spouse’s manipulation, ignoring a live-at-home son’s irresponsibility, not confronting a friend’s addiction. We excuse people again and again, and then kick ourselves for not setting better boundaries. But this important audio book, with its transformational tools and insightful illustrations from leading Christian counselor Tim Clinton and noted author Pat Springle, will guide you in not only breaking through to better relationships but making big changes for the better. With their expert principles for learning to say yes when you want to and no when you need to, you’ll discover how to give up your need to please, rescue, fix, or control anyone else. Leave others’ unrealistic expectations behind. Speak the hard truth to those who have hurt you. And exchange harmful relationship habits for healthy ones. Here is the expert advice you need for knowing when to give in and how to push back for the best life you can have with the people you love most.
Audio CD
Publisher: Oasis Audio; Library edition (May 22, 2012)
Language: English
ISBN-10: 1609815106
ISBN-13: 978-1609815103
Product Dimensions: 6.5 x 0.6 x 5.5 inches
Shipping Weight: 9.1 ounces (View shipping rates and policies)
Average Customer Review: 4.6 out of 5 stars See all reviews (85 customer reviews)
Best Sellers Rank: #2,340,232 in Books (See Top 100 in Books) #197 in Books > Books on CD > Parenting & Families > Interpersonal Relations #632 in Books > Christian Books & Bibles > Christian Living > Counseling #969 in Books > Health, Fitness & Dieting > Mental Health > Codependency
Clinton and Springle assert that many of us have flaccid boundaries and codependent relationships because we have placed others in the position reserved only for God. We may give in, rescuing the object of our devotion from the consequences of their actions, or we may dominate and micromanage their choices, or we may even flee from them; but the source remains the same. Damaged relationships are a form of idolatry.This thesis, sure to be controversial in certain circles, manages to smoothly unify the worlds of Christian theology and psychotherapy. Both are historically based on the belief that we as humans naturally have things out of balance. And, as these and other authors have noted recently, the latest discoveries in human psychology have served to ratify the bulk of Christian insights on the soul, from Paul and Augustine to Erasmus and Calvin.When we identify how we make idols of the people around us, we identify the tools at our disposal to correct the problem. However, because we make idols in so many different ways, any one-size-fits-all solution will fall flat. Clinton and Springle collate the various ways we as humans manufacture idols out of the people we love, and force us to ask ourselves hard questions. Only then, they say, can we address the problems.And address them we do. Through a mix of anecdote, Socratic dialogue, and counseling, they make us take stock of how we reached the point we're at, and only then guide us on how to get back on track. I don't recall seeing a better integrated piece of Christian counseling than this. Most books lean to either evangelism or therapy, and use the other to bolster the chosen central track, but these authors treat Christianity and counseling as two halves of one whole.
"To find the right balance of responsibility, some of us need to say less, some need to say more; some need to sit down, some need to stand up; some need to say no, some need to say yes." Break Through, page 190At a clergy retreat nearly twenty years ago now, I was introduced to the concept of enmeshment in family systems. Since that time when I have done premarital counseling I have emphasized understanding family systems and how it affects one's marital relationship.I have also thought of Abbot and Costello's classic Who's On First routine as it relates to family life. Seriously, some families know who is exactly on first. Other families are not sure who is on first, "oh the kids are out there...somewhere..." Enmeshment is a cause for both views.Enmeshment is a relationship killer. It causes strong and confident people to lose their confidence and identity. It causes power hungry people to grow more powerful and domineering. It disables relationships, hope, love, and truth.Dr. Tim Clinton and Pat Springle has provided us with a detailed, yet hopeful portrait of how to overcome enmeshed relationships and dynamics from a faith perspective that avoids a simplistic and "preachy" approach and tone. Break Through: When to Give In, How to Push Back (released yesterday, May 22, 2012, by Worthy Publishing ) offers some practical and helpful suggestions for learning how to deal with enmeshed relationships in marriage and family life.The book begins with an overview of how enmeshment destroys vital relationships and is rooted in a false view of love that causes people to use denial to avoid dealing with the reality of dysfunction in a any relationship.
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